Benumb
by LenkaJeneva
Summary: Takes place during PoA. A small humorous one-shot that takes place during an... odd... conversation between Harry and Hermione. It may become a two-shot.


**It's only an oneshot for now, just a little something that I thought would make a funny story. I figure I might continue with it – if I get enough reviews. Any suggestions or corrections are welcome! There are a few things that I'd like to expand on, so it will probably become a two-shot.**

**Read and Review. Thanks for reading and all that jazz.**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter.

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"I'm on the Granger drug!"

"I could handle that."

"I don't think so," Hermione scrunched up her nose as she looked down at him, "The Granger drug is so much more powerful than the Potter drug."

"That's a lie," Harry sat up in his seat, he glanced at the dying embers before turning back to her, "I could totally handle it."

"I somehow doubt that."

"The Potter drug is just as powerful – maybe more! I mean I, well, no. That was an accident…"

Hermione leaned forward in anticipation; his tone, so uncertain, so shy, so nervous… "What?"

"You know that cra – well, no, comet, but…" he nervously ran a hand through his dark hair as he rambled. "Well, the dinosaurs, they, you know, died – comet killed 'em. Accident – didn't mean to–"

"That was you!" Hermione gathered her courage and sent him the stink eye, "I put them there to protect them!"

"I didn't mean to!" Harry jumped in keenly. "It was an accident! I couldn't control my powers!"

"And neither could I! But I didn't destroy an entire species!"

"I didn't mean to!"

"I should kill you!"

"You wouldn't dare…" Harry recoiled from her threatening hand, and he could dimly hear the sound of rummaging from upstairs. He pushed it out of his mind. "I'm your best friend!"

Hermione waved her hand threateningly in his face. Harry took a step back. "That was before you obliterated the dinosaurs! Those poor little babies…"

"Err…" Harry took another step back. "I could annihilate you before you killed me." He offered meekly.

She sent him another evil eye. "And I could completely wipe out you and your life with a blink of an eye."

"That's not fun."

Both were silent, staring each other down in the dark common room as the embers slowly dwindled down to their last number.

At least they were silent until the loud squeak of a step broke the quiet, both jumped, Harry falling onto his bottom as Hermione whipped out her wand. She pointed it steadily at the staircase, not moving as Harry took out his own wand, a whispered 'Lumos' bathing the room in light.

No one stood on the stairs.

She turned to Harry, his lit wand held easily in his hands as they surveyed the empty common room. Harry was still sitting on the ground beside her, looking for the world like he'd rather never stand up again.

The lazy fat-ass.

She settled down beside him with a sigh, he dropped his wand a little bit more, never extinguishing the light.

"We should probably call a truce." Hermione told him, putting her wand back inside her cloak. "We're too powerful to be against each other."

"We could destroy the world with one of our little spats." Harry acquitted.

"It's for the better of humanity."

"We'd be saving millions of lives," He stated at her solemn nod. "We'll need lines that we can't cross. Like a no powers rule – we can't have you shape-shifting ever other hour and freaking people out."

"And you can't be turning into a million animals."

"What about running at the speed of light?" He couldn't stop the amused smile from spreading across his face. "Why do you think I'm so good at quidditch?"

"Alright, you can have that," an equally amused grin spread across her own face, "but I still get my shape-shifting – just a little."

"I can do that. And clothing. Have to have a clothing rule." An irritated scowl crossed his face, "I _absolutely_ refuse to wear spandex or some Speedo or something…"

She snickered in amusement at the mental image. "Not like superman?"

"Definitely not like superman." He deadpanned. She burst out laughing. "Not helping."

"Wasn't," she snorted, "trying."

"Are you done yet?" Harry asked as she sat down beside him, leaning up against him as she caught her breath. Although his question didn't help, she snorted once more before calming down. "So the clothing rule?"

"Ah," Hermione cleared her throat to rid of the urge to burst out laughing once again. "The clothing rule – personally, I don't think that we need one. I can shape-shift, yeah? That means that I don't need clothes. And you can walk around nude for all I care."

Harry's bemused face shifted quickly, a stern expression stared back at her as though she thought the world was flat. "That's not funny."

"What?" Hermione blinked at him in confusion.

"It's not funny. You shouldn't talk like that."

So they sat, on the floor of the Gryffindor Common Room, staring at each other. Harry's expression oddly serious, Hermione's politely perplexed. Both were wearing their pajama's underneath thick robes to shield them from the cold, the dieing embers did nothing to warm the room. "Err… Okay, Harry?"

He simply gave her peculiar look before standing up, "Might as well head up to bed, right?"

"Yeah, I mean," Hermione stood quickly, walking toward the stairs, where Harry was now standing, "You know that I wouldn't actually walk around nude, right?"

There was a sound behind her, but both ignored it. Crookshanks liked to wander around during the night. "I'd hope not."

He turned around stiffly, but not before he could stifle his patented Cheshire grin.

"Harry!"

He walked up the stairs in amusement, swaggering his hips, "Make sure you put your clothes on in the morning," he called to her softly, attempting to make sure his bedmates didn't wake.

"Don't you dare walk away from me!" She ran to the bottom the stairs, "Harry! I can't _believe_ you tricked me like that! That's _mean_... _Harry_!"

He only laughed as he walked up to his room.


End file.
